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April 5, 2003
The Trouble with Maps
Note: this is a post recovered from my old blog, before it died of an insufficient backup. Any comments/trackbacks on it have not been brought over, but can be seen with the original. The date is that of the original posting.
Iraqi Minister of Disinformation, Day 1: The evil invaders have been repulsed at the border.
Day 2: The infidel foe has been utterly defeated at Umm Qasr.
Day 3: The enemy dead litter the field around Basra. Allah is merciful.
Day 4: Our brave, courageous and loyal soldiers have repulsed the enemy at An Nasiriyah.
Day 5: Allah has given us victory at An Najaf, and the enemy plan is in tatters. Surely the kaffir will soon realize the error of his ways.
(Time passes)
Day 14: Al Kut has been the burial ground of thousands of infidels as our brave Arab nation has beaten the enemy with pickup trucks.
Day 15: The ground quakes beneath the wrath of Allah as he slaughters the sons of pigs and monkeys at the Saddam airport.
Day 16: Our brave 10-year old soldiers have repulsed the enemy from the outskirts of Baghdad.
Day 17: No press conference today.
When I become the Dark Overlord, the first thing I'm going to do is burn all of the maps, just in case I get invaded. Wouldn't want the people to lose heart that way.
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