January 13, 2004

Return of the King Part I - Many Whinings

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Ah, see, I knew you hadn't. Okay, here's the list:

  • Frodo told Sam to leave - and Sam left. What?! WHAT??!! I understand what PJ was doing here, but did he have to?
  • I didn't like Gollum setting up Sam. It was unnecessary. Gollum already had a plan to kill them both; why bother with splitting them up and running Sam off? I also didn't think that that kind of subterfuge was in Gollum's nature. He was mean and sneaky and nasty, yest, but I never got the impression that he was clever enough to pull that kind of deception. It seems to me to be a different kind of thing than luring them to Shelob's lair.
  • I didn't like Denethor's flaming leap. I like him dying as in the book, more dignified, laying on the bier holding the palantír: "Then Denethor leaped upon the table, and standing there wreathed in fire and smoke he took up the staff of his stewardship that lay at his feet and broke it on his knee. Casting the pieces into the blaze he bowed and laid himself on the table, clasping the palantír with both hands upon his breast. And it was said that ever after, if any man looked in that Stone ... he saw only two aged hands withering in flame."

    Denethor was deranged, but he never lost his dignity.

    And the cherry tomatoes were really disgusting.

  • Tell me, what would have happened to Andúril if Arwen hadn't turned around and told her Daddy off? I picture the shards of Narsil decorating Elrond's mantel in the Undying Lands ... and Aragorn standing around at the defeat at Pelennor thinking how cool it would be if he had a good sword ...
  • The Dead weren't scary enough. They wren't set up well enough. And I didn't like Aragorn asking them to come fight for him. What was his plan B if they had said no?
  • I wish Éowyn's lines had not been cut when she killed the Witch King: "You stand between me and my lord and kin. Begone, if you be not deathless! For living or dark undead, I will smite you, if you touch him." Not a big deal. The scene was still good. I just like those lines. I would have loved it even better if, at some point after Aragorn told her he doesn't love her, she had some line to the effect of "If I can't have love, then I will have my chance to fight."
  • I won't even start on the whole Aragorn/Arwen thing. It wasn't as bad in this movie, mainly because they had already done all the damage they could to that relationship, and the only thing left was to redeem it. Which they did. Barely.
  • Aw, shucks. With all those great rousing battle speeches, there was no "Now for wrath, now for ruin and a red dawn!"
  • In the scene where Aragorn grabs the palantír away from Pippin, why can he not keep his hold on it?

And that's it, really. There are other parts that are missing entirely from the movie, but from what I hear these will be included in the extended edition DVD. I particularly look forward to seeing the scenes from the Houses of Healing, which will give the story of Éowyn and Faramir.

Coming soon: So, what did she like, anyway?

Posted by Steph at January 13, 2004 06:46 PM
Comments

Well, I still haven't seen the movie, but I read anyway. B/C I've missed your blogging the past few days. :-)

Dy- geek by trade

Posted by: Dy on January 13, 2004 07:33 PM

Moved on with my life? What's that?

"Tell me, what would have happened to Andúril if Arwen hadn't turned around and told her Daddy off? I picture the shards of Narsil decorating Elrond's mantel in the Undying Lands ... and Aragorn standing around at the defeat at Pelennor thinking how cool it would be if he had a good sword ..."

Bwahahahahah!

As for the dead not being scary, etc, I wonder if the fear of Pirates of the Carribean comparrisons was a motivation?

My least favorite moment: Arwen playing peekaboo behind a banner. Eeewww.

I liked everything with Pippin. His strength in the film was a big surprise, in terms of how strong his effect on me was.

Just a few thoughts that popped into my head (gee, can you tell I missed you these past few days?)

Posted by: Sarah on January 13, 2004 07:50 PM

I seem to remember Theoden pulling out the "red dawn" in his speech as they were going onto the Pelennor Fields. His speech as a stand-alone was okay but not great. However, that still is my favorite scene in the movie. The combination of the visuals and music as they start their ride was just amazing. That was as close to a tear-jerker moment as the movie got for me.

I'd heard several people (maybe you more than once) talk about Aragorn asking the Dead, so I listened to his words carefully. He didn't outright ask, but neither did he demand. It was a statement: "I'm here for your allegiance" was about the gist of it.

Posted by: Mark L on January 14, 2004 07:57 AM

Mark,

No, Theoden's speech was GREAT, but it didn't have the "red dawn" bit in it. Not that that in any way detracted from the movie; I just like that line :)

Theoden's speech was wonderful, and the whole bit with him riding down the line and touching all the swords ... ah! That is definitely one of the best bits of the movie. That was close to a teary moment for me too, especially on the second viewing.

By the way, I never actually cried at the movie. But I've got the soundtrack now, and "Into the West" reduces me to tears every time I listen.

As for Aragorn (hey, are you insinuating that I might have gone on about it?), he said "What say you?" and I think that's asking. On the other hand, what he says there is perfectly consistent with movie Aragorn, who is still not sure he should be ordering people around as their king. Book Aragorn doesn't have that issue. It did bug me less on the second viewing, when I was more able to put the book aside.

Sarah, I didn't like the "peekaboo" moment either. I was cringing. Thank goodness it was a good kiss :)

Pippin - Pippin was awesome! Go Billy Boyd! And I understand that several of Merry's scenes were cut, so maybe the extended edition will have some kind of similar character development for Merry as well. Yes, Pippin in general was a highlight of the film.

Posted by: Stephanie on January 14, 2004 09:48 AM

Some thoughts in no particular order:

I hated the close-ups of Denethor's eating the first time I saw it, but the second time I saw it, I realized it was one of those devices used by you fancy English major types. Cherry tomato juice looking like blood huh, huh?

Eowyn's slaying of the Witch King was one of my favorite moments of the book; it wasn't quite done justice in the film.

The fierceness of the Rohirrim's charge was captured magnificently and was one of my favorite scenes of the movie.

Battle scene quote that I missed most(paraphrasing): "Who am I? I'm Aragorn, King, son of Arathorn. I am the right hand of vengeance, and the boot that is gonna kick your sorry ass all the way back to Middle-Earth, sweetheart. I'm death incarnate and the last living thing that you're ever going to see. God sent me."

Now tell me that wouldn't have been cool! Maybe sub Gandalf for God though...

Posted by: on January 15, 2004 02:46 PM

Oop's, sorry - that was my post. Note to self: fill in the fields before posting!!!

Posted by: Brian on January 15, 2004 02:48 PM

YES!!!!!!!! Brian, you rock!

On the cherry tomatoes: yes, Brian, that is what we fancy English majors call a "metaphor." If you learn how to take your paltry cherry tomatoes=blood statement and stretch it into 10 pages, you too could have an English degree.

Okay, funny moment I just read about. Apparently while filming the scene at Dunharrow where Elrond delivers Andúril, PJ gave Hugo Weaving a pair of Matrix-style glasses. So when Aragorn came into the tent, Elrond took off his cape, put on the glasses and said: "Your Dunedain disguise does not fool me, Mr. Anderson."

Posted by: Stephanie on January 15, 2004 07:20 PM

I thought that the calvary scene was a blessing for medieval historians. For at least a generation, give or take, they probably won't have students who have a hard time grasping why having a good calvary was important in battle!!

Why are horses important? Because they're like TANKS without bullets.

One question - what ever happened to Mr Potatohead? the baddie ork leader. We don't see him die a satisfying death. And for that matter, why is he such a low key, rather pathetic bad guy? Compare that to Lurck, or Lurch, you know, what's his face, in the first movie.

My .02

(miss you Steph. Been visiting this page to no avail lately - missed you so much I went digging around in your comments! LOL)

Posted by: Sarah on January 20, 2004 06:19 PM
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